Friendships versus acquaintances

So lately the Drama Llamas have been out in full force.  I don’t know if it has to do with it being winter and people are spending more time indoors or what it is, but I don’t have time for them in my life.  All of the Drama Llama craziness has gotten me thinking about friendships versus acquaintances.  When does someone change from being an acquaintance to a friend?  Most of us are lucky if we can count our friends on one hand.  Even luckier if we can use both.

As the saying goes there are friends who come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime.  Obviously I’m grateful for those who I interact with and come into my life but am very selective about who I allow into my tribe.  I joked with a friend that I’m too old to go through the work.  At this point in my life if it isn’t easy to hang out with someone, or if it becomes too much work, I’m out.  We all have lives, we all have our own problems, who wants to have to take on the problems of others?  Obviously we do for our close friends and family but what about these acquaintances who try so hard to wiggle their way in?  I think you have to stand your ground.  It takes work to maintain a friendship, as I’ve mentioned before.  You make time to see them, take time to text or FaceTime, maybe even write a handwritten note (although I know that ages me).  If you have 20+ years going then this time can pass and you can pick up where you left off.  But if it is a new friendship, in my opinion, the interaction needs to be there in order for the friendship to be sustainable.

Recently a mommy friend that I was once close with deleted me on social media.  When I first found out I was curious as to why she would do this.  Later, I found out she had done the same with another friend.  It got me thinking that I hadn’t put any effort into continuing a relationship with this woman, and quite honestly neither had she, so I guess sooner or later it was bound to happen.  But it also got me thinking, was she really a friend or was she an acquaintance?  Were we ‘friends’ because of our similar circumstances (new moms) or would we have become close if that wasn’t the case?

So how long does it take you to let someone in?  What is your guide to calling someone your friend?  Would a few interactions count?  Would it take more than that?  Someone told me at a very young age that I was jaded.  Interestingly enough that comment has stayed with me until today some 20+ years later, so I’d love to hear your take.

If you’re wondering I didn’t come up with the Drama Llama saying, I’m honestly sure who did but there are some cute Drama Llama tee  Snorg Tees.  Be sure to check them out.

 

Roula

Roula

A little ditty about Jack and Diane...no really in all seriousness I'm a daughter, sister, wife and mother. I'm a Greek-American, who has transplanted in Canada. As a first time mom I'm sharing some things as I go along.

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